Saturday, July 28, 2012

Just a Number

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When I made the commitment to change my habits, weight and life on January 1st, I was scared witless.  I had no idea that I would be successful. I'd never had a substantial amount of weight to lose, and the psychological triggers behind my overeating were overwhelming at times. Maybe I would be the human who would defy physics and continue to grow fatter no matter what!
Anyone who makes that first serious step toward making a change - be it weight loss or some other goal- should be commended for their bravery. It is, after all, a major leap of faith. They have no idea how much work, perseverance, willpower or stubbornness it will take to succeed. They only know that the unknown finally looks better than what they see in the mirror.
Seven months ago, I avoided full length mirrors at all costs. I'd find myself in a dressing room trying on clothes ONLY when I had outgrown everything in my closet. I'd change as fast as I could, and glance up only to see if the fit would be passable. That feeling has slowly changed over the past few months, but it will take time for my mental body image to catch up with my physical one. I put on about a pound a month for 4 and a half years, and have lost over 35 pounds in the past seven months.
I had a "use it or lose it" coupon for Old Navy last week. For the first time in over 5 years, I put on a pair of size 8 jeans and stared at myself in wonder. Not only did they fit, they looked damn good. Sophie stared at me and said, "You look HOT, Mom!" In my head, I thought, "I KNOW!"
It's way too warm to wear those jeans now, but you know what? If I have a bad day, I'll be putting them on and dancing around in front of the mirror. NOT going through the MacDonald's drive thru. Eight may be just a number, but right now, to me, it's a badge of honor. A certificate of amazing achievement. I have many things in my life to be thankful for, and proud of, but this ranks right up there. Anyone who has been there knows exactly how I feel, and anyone who wants to be there, I sincerely wish you all the best. You CAN do it!!


CelticKnot said...

Jennie, I cannot express how proud I am of your accomplishment and bravery. I know how tough weight loss is, and you have proven that you are even tougher. You are a remarkable woman. Congratulations!

Angela said...

Awesome news Jennie.... I share that feeling with you... after shedding my 84 pounds in 2011... I wear my size 8's with pride... the last time I wore size 8 jeans I was 13 years old... GOOD JOB JENNIE !!!! ♥

Mom said...

YOU GO MY GIRL!!! It's sooo wonderful to see you taking care of yourself again! Many, many, times I wanted to talk with you about what was going on with you but thought better of doing so. I just didn't think it was my place to delve into your issues unless you brought them up. It's a very difficult thing to watch your most beloved treasure struggle and be unhappy and not be able to do a thing about it but pray that things will change when you're ready to make the change. I'm so proud and happy that you reached that point and....danced! You had the courage to attack your problems and you won! Congratulations! You look fabulous! Your current good health, both mental and physical, has put a glow on your face and a smile on your lips! YOU GO GIRL...YOU DANCE TILL THE COWS COME HOME!!

Donna -Little Tiny Stitches said...

Och Jennie. I am SO PROUD of you. You are the most amazing, inspiring lady I know and ever will know.
I can't express how happy I am that you've fought all year and WON!!!!

I love ya loads my lovely!!
Have a great week, and keep dancing my sweet :D


Evelyn said...

congratulations on your success! I'm on the same boat right now and seems like a long road ahead of me.

Jennie said...

I really appreciate all of your kind comments and support!!

Evelyn- I KNOW that feeling of the long road. My advice- Keep your eyes on just the part of the "road" you see right in front of you, and try to only focus on the steps you make each day. They will add up and up and you'll look behind you and think "Look how far I came!" You'll look ahead and realize, "Gosh, I'm almost there!"